How was your Valentine’s Day?
Whether you’re in a relationship or not, I’m curious if you felt full in your heart yesterday.
Just like you, I saw all the posts on Facebook…numerous pictures of flowers and kisses and sweet memes and sweethearts reminding us all to feel the joy of this lovely Hallmark-made occasion.
How was it for you? Were you in your bliss feeling the love?
If you’re in a relationship and ecstatic, awesome. If you’re not in a relationship and experiencing great joy, superb.
If you’re in a relationship (or not) and are experiencing emptiness, anger or are triggered, then I encourage you to read on…
Firstly, I am sending you a big virtual hug! I know how V day can bring up some uncomfortable feelings and can do a number on you. Been there, done that. That’s why I am writing you today.
I remember times in my life when I was not in a relationship and felt horribly alone. I wondered what was wrong with me and if I was lovable. I questioned if I was I destined to be alone forever.
I also remember times when I was in a relationship and I felt more alone then ever because I wasn’t connecting with my partner the way I thought we could or should be connecting.
All these beliefs about how things should be or how we think our lives should look create such inner turmoil.
There was one particular Valentine’s Day while I was married that really sucked. I could say it was my husband’s fault, but was it really him that caused my sadness? I had expectations and he fell short big time.
Where do these expectations come from?
I certainly blamed him and made quite the scene when it was late in the day and I still had not received flowers, a card or anything. How could he do that to me? Didn’t he love me?
I now see the programming of our society that set me up for conflict, but at the time, his actions, or lack there of, had big meaning to me. Just to be fair, he did say he was busy and didn’t have a chance to get out to the store to get me a gift, but my Valentine rule had been broken. The rule was to be prepared and if you really love me, you would plan ahead. Oh my, what a set up.
We get bombarded by social messages all the time how we’re supposed to be. On Valentines Day especially, there’s so much pressure. If you have someone special in your life and have expectations…God forbid they fall short because your day of sweetness can turn quickly into quite the drama.
Ok, so that’s one thing to look at, your expectations, where they came from and is that how you want to live your life. If you change that mental wiring and see V day as an opportunity to connect and love without all the shoulds, you might have quite a different day, no?
There’s something else even bigger here I want to address which is your ability to feel love even if your love life is not up to par. Again, whether you’re alone or not should not dictate how you feel.
Through the years I have learned that it’s truly an inside job to feel the richness of life. It took some major healing and rewiring but I can now shout from the rooftops, IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT IS HAPPENING IN YOUR LIFE FOR YOU TO FEEL MASSIVE JOY!
There are powerful tools of transformation that can help you experience love in a heartbeat. One is obvious, look at the expectations, question them, then let them go!
Another tool that’s pretty cool and you can use it anywhere is accessing your memory. Think of a time you felt love. Close your eyes and take a breath and think back to a moment in your life where you felt ecstatic. Maybe when the boy down the street gave you a picked daisy or when you heard your child’s first cry after birth. Think of something that fills up your heart. You have access to this memory and you can use it when you feel empty. Just take some time to go into that memory, see it, feel it and allow it to take over you and you will feel a shift.
Using the memory tool is a great quick fix for sure, but feeling alone, like you don’t matter or feeling unlovable goes back a long way. Your life’s experiences shaped you and those early childhood messages can still plague you with terrible emotional pain, especially on V day.
So, another way to feel love more is to do some of the deeper Shadow Work® healing processes. This allows you to get really clear about the love you want to draw to you and inside of you. You also get to go back to those old days where you got the messages that you were unlovable or that you didn’t matter and you shift those silly untruths. Once you transform the old programming, you can feel the wholeness and inner sweetness you are craving AND you have the ability to have much deeper relationships with yourself and others.
If you want to feel more love on a regular basis inside OR are wanting to find a great partner to share love with, the inner love journey needs to be catered to.
Helping people feel more love is my specialty! I have been to the depths of despair and to the heights of ecstasy and I can show you the way if you are ready. Are you?
I have room in my practice for a couple more people, so I have decided to open 5 consultation slots in the calendar for people seriously looking to shift the old programming and who want to bring more love into their life.
“I WANT MORE LOVE IN MY LIFE DISCOVERY SESSION”
It’s complimentary and a first step to long lasting LOVE. We’ll have a 60 minute discovery session to see what’s going on that keeps you from feeling the joy you crave. Then we can talk about the one-on-one MANIFEST YOUR LOVE Coaching Program I have created to get you the big shifts you want so you can have overflowing love in your life.
May you know how loved you are…